Vadgupgem is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, loving guinea pig.

Vadgupgem created a down quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Vadgupgem, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Vadgupgem, he will strike you with lightening.

Vadgupgem's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Vadgupgem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Vadgupgem.

4. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Vadgupgem in the centre of the settlement.

5. Run away from blue foxes, for they are unholy.