Pangedcabpag is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, deceitful wolf.

Pangedcabpag created carbon seven million years ago.

If you believe in Pangedcabpag, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Pangedcabpag, she will turn you into a mole.

Pangedcabpag's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Pangedcabpag's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Pangedcabpag.

2. Erect a giant zinc sculpture of Pangedcabpag in the centre of the settlement.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not keep three dogs in a large pit.

5. Always help goats.