Gepzodren Hitqueegbed is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, thoughtless hamster.

Gepzodren Hitqueegbed created dark energy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Gepzodren Hitqueegbed, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Gepzodren Hitqueegbed, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Gepzodren Hitqueegbed's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Gepzodren Hitqueegbed's Holy Commandments

1. Gepzodren Hitqueegbed must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Never wear purple shoes.

3. Erect a giant gray sculpture of Gepzodren Hitqueegbed in the centre of the settlement.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not skip in public.