Koncissrig is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, boastful crab.

Koncissrig created a quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Koncissrig, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Koncissrig, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Koncissrig's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Koncissrig's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

3. Do not keep eight porpoises in a large pit.

4. You must love Koncissrig.

5. Do not speak about garlic.