Zenmumflat is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, astonishing unicorn.

Zenmumflat created the planet Earth eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zenmumflat, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Zenmumflat, he will turn you into a hamster.

Zenmumflat's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Zenmumflat's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate turtles.

3. Run away if five birds approach from the west.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate voles.

5. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.