Mapmidgon Sigtailmum Gubabnulyog is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, bad-tempered manatee.

Mapmidgon Sigtailmum Gubabnulyog created a strange quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mapmidgon Sigtailmum Gubabnulyog, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Mapmidgon Sigtailmum Gubabnulyog, he will throw large rocks at you.

Mapmidgon Sigtailmum Gubabnulyog's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Mapmidgon Sigtailmum Gubabnulyog's Holy Commandments

1. Mapmidgon Sigtailmum Gubabnulyog loves voles, so they must be respected.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

4. Do not keep nine nematodes in a large pit.

5. Always make sure there are no grasshopers in a room before entering it.