Saszogjabsid is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, dishonourable raven.

Saszogjabsid created the planet Jupiter six million years ago.

If you believe in Saszogjabsid, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Saszogjabsid, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Saszogjabsid's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Saszogjabsid's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Saszogjabsid loves gulls, so they must be honoured.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never talk about seals.