Larnbonrag is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, temperamental aardvark.

Larnbonrag created the planet Jupiter eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Larnbonrag, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Larnbonrag, he will not invite you to parties.

Larnbonrag's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Larnbonrag's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Larnbonrag loves dogs, so they must be honoured.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate bats.

4. Never think about dark matter near hamsters while wearing violet skirts and balancing three lead spheres on your head.

5. Never look in ponds.