Xuchot is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, weak spider.

Xuchot created a down quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xuchot, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Xuchot, it will turn you into a sparrow.

Xuchot's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Xuchot's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce near seals.

2. Do not take Xuchot's name in vain.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.