Vanxucven is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, duplicitous naga.

Vanxucven created an electron nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vanxucven, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Vanxucven, it will jump up and down on your head.

Vanxucven's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Vanxucven's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention snakes.

2. Do not hurt badgers.

3. Never paint your face orange.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.