Bonjabyam is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, unthinking owl.

Bonjabyam created everything that exists nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Bonjabyam, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bonjabyam, it will turn you into a plant.

Bonjabyam's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Bonjabyam's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

2. Never wear brown hats.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

5. Hide if six seals approach from the west.