Lagspagcep is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, omnipotent pig.

Lagspagcep created the Black Eye Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Lagspagcep, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Lagspagcep, he will cry a lot.

Lagspagcep's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Lagspagcep's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Lagspagcep.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never laugh near aardvarks.

4. Never go into fawn rooms.

5. Pray towards the west.