Hadmumtof Jinpidstan is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, staggering shark.

Hadmumtof Jinpidstan created a Higgs boson three billion years ago.

If you believe in Hadmumtof Jinpidstan, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Hadmumtof Jinpidstan, she will not care.

Hadmumtof Jinpidstan's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Hadmumtof Jinpidstan's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Always help voles in need.

3. Never hurt dolphins.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. You must pray to Hadmumtof Jinpidstan eight times a day.