Bimmincitloop Nakmisgess is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, blissful wren.

Bimmincitloop Nakmisgess created snails three billion years ago.

If you believe in Bimmincitloop Nakmisgess, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Bimmincitloop Nakmisgess, it will turn you into a puffin.

Bimmincitloop Nakmisgess' most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Bimmincitloop Nakmisgess' Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry seals.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Always make sure there are no snakes in a building before entering it.