Gungarzog Dinlipcuss is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, loving shrew.

Gungarzog Dinlipcuss created an up quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gungarzog Dinlipcuss, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Gungarzog Dinlipcuss, it will throw large rocks at you.

Gungarzog Dinlipcuss' most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Gungarzog Dinlipcuss' Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint in the presence of mice.

2. Gungarzog Dinlipcuss loves goats, so they must be respected.

3. Never talk about chromosomes.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. You must never eat peanuts.