Quartbungem is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, smart butterfly.

Quartbungem created a strange quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quartbungem, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Quartbungem, it will turn you into a dog.

Quartbungem's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Quartbungem's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant in the presence of frogs.

2. Never wear trousers.

3. Always help goats.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate horses.

5. Never talk about quantum mechanics near bats while wearing brown shoes and balancing three aluminium spheres on your legs.