Rutspagbenkom is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, smart mouse.

Rutspagbenkom created gold four years ago.

If you believe in Rutspagbenkom, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Rutspagbenkom, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Rutspagbenkom's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Rutspagbenkom's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Learn nine new languages a year.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate snails.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Erect a giant pink sculpture of Rutspagbenkom in the centre of the settlement.