Litsagnurt is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, thoughtless unicorn.

Litsagnurt created a Higgs boson five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Litsagnurt, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Litsagnurt, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Litsagnurt's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Litsagnurt's Holy Commandments

1. Litsagnurt must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Never think ill of sick pigs.

3. Always obey Litsagnurt's priests.

4. Do not keep four tapirs in a large pit.

5. Never think about special relativity.