Pakguttailgutbitveg is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, pitiless manatee.

Pakguttailgutbitveg created the cosmos nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pakguttailgutbitveg, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Pakguttailgutbitveg, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Pakguttailgutbitveg's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Pakguttailgutbitveg's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity near manatees while wearing blue shorts and balancing seven iron spheres on your feet.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never think about planets.

5. Pray towards the south.