Sawotced Bamhindod is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, stupid finch.

Sawotced Bamhindod created a quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sawotced Bamhindod, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Sawotced Bamhindod, she will destroy your home solar system.

Sawotced Bamhindod's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Sawotced Bamhindod's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate ducks.