Jipriplit is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, witty porpoise.

Jipriplit created the world six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jipriplit, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Jipriplit, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Jipriplit's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Jipriplit's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt grasshopers.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Run away from mauve manatees, for they are unholy.

4. Do not wear purple clothing.

5. Do not drink alcohol.