Fagbonkvig Hugsaslog is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, contented gnu.

Fagbonkvig Hugsaslog created an atom nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fagbonkvig Hugsaslog, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Fagbonkvig Hugsaslog, she will ignore you.

Fagbonkvig Hugsaslog's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Fagbonkvig Hugsaslog's Holy Commandments

1. Never jump in the presence of bats.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never wear coats.

4. Do not take Fagbonkvig Hugsaslog's name in vain.

5. Learn seven new languages a year.