Xinbot is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, unsympathetic shrew.

Xinbot created humanity two billion years ago.

If you believe in Xinbot, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Xinbot, it will turn you into a rock.

Xinbot's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Xinbot's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark matter near frogs while wearing gray ear rings and balancing eight zinc spheres on your back.

2. Never hurt whales.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Never eat lemons.