Fligfatvag is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, grumpy hyena.

Fligfatvag created the Black Eye Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fligfatvag, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Fligfatvag, it will turn you into a snail.

Fligfatvag's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Fligfatvag's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not keep three bats in a large pit.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never think about quantum field theory near rats while wearing white jumpers and balancing eight iron spheres on your chest.