Fasnurhog is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, capable gorilla.

Fasnurhog created the Whirlpool Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fasnurhog, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Fasnurhog, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Fasnurhog's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Fasnurhog's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed tomatoes to dolphins while wearing dresses.

2. Do not hop in public.

3. Never write about moons.

4. Always help sick frogs.

5. Never feed lots of beans to mites while wearing fawn tights.