Leglapvag is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, conceited swan.

Leglapvag created an up quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Leglapvag, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Leglapvag, she will laugh at you.

Leglapvag's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Leglapvag's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Leglapvag loves snails, so they must be honoured.

3. Never hurt mites.

4. Dolphins are not to be trusted.

5. Learn six new languages a year.