Cinjopkip Yathakquill is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, smart fish.

Cinjopkip Yathakquill created time and space twelve years ago.

If you believe in Cinjopkip Yathakquill, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cinjopkip Yathakquill, it will destroy your home solar system.

Cinjopkip Yathakquill's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Cinjopkip Yathakquill's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. You must never eat tomatoes.

3. Never look at black holes.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Put Cinjopkip Yathakquill first in all things.