Butappgum is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, unfair armadillo.

Butappgum created everything that exists four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Butappgum, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Butappgum, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Butappgum's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Butappgum's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Never hurt aardvarks.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never think about fluid mechanics near moths while wearing cyan stockings and balancing five aluminium spheres on your hands.

5. Always treat great tits with great respect.