Loopjop is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, strong shrew.

Loopjop created a photon four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Loopjop, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Loopjop, he will curse you with boils.

Loopjop's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Loopjop's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about badgers.

2. Erect a giant orange sculpture of Loopjop in the centre of the settlement.

3. Loopjop loves hamsters, so they must be respected.

4. Loopjop loves moths, so they must be honoured.

5. Never talk about dwarf planets.