Zencusscet is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, ruthless clam.

Zencusscet created a charm quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Zencusscet, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Zencusscet, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Zencusscet's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Zencusscet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your head.

2. Always help sick frogs.

3. Zencusscet loves monkeys, so they must be respected.

4. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

5. Erect a giant zinc sculpture of Zencusscet in the centre of the settlement.