Davhonfit is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, moody whale.

Davhonfit created everything that exists seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Davhonfit, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Davhonfit, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Davhonfit's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Davhonfit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Learn four new languages a year.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.