Farnmidsand is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, unselfish human.

Farnmidsand created a bottom quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Farnmidsand, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Farnmidsand, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Farnmidsand's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Farnmidsand's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Never sit near doves.

5. Erect a large copper sculpture of Farnmidsand on top of all buildings.