Dimfidqueeg Labwatkomsin Ortdudwip is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, intelligent human.

Dimfidqueeg Labwatkomsin Ortdudwip created the solar system eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dimfidqueeg Labwatkomsin Ortdudwip, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Dimfidqueeg Labwatkomsin Ortdudwip, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Dimfidqueeg Labwatkomsin Ortdudwip's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Dimfidqueeg Labwatkomsin Ortdudwip's Holy Commandments

1. Erect nine silicon sculptures of Dimfidqueeg Labwatkomsin Ortdudwip on top of important buildings.

2. Never write about solid mechanics.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate hamsters.