Gompodjen is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, grumpy raccoon.

Gompodjen created tapeworms seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Gompodjen, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Gompodjen, she will be very unhappy.

Gompodjen's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Gompodjen's Holy Commandments

1. Always help manatees.

2. Never think about planets.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

4. Never eat oranges.

5. Feed all hungry tortoises.