Flabsaspig is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, sapient ferret.

Flabsaspig created the Large Magellanic Cloud five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flabsaspig, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Flabsaspig, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Flabsaspig's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Flabsaspig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about optics.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never feed wheat to mites while wearing ear rings.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Never talk about black holes.