Madbarnfompopstiktof Rilbussaf is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, witless hamster.

Madbarnfompopstiktof Rilbussaf created snails nine million years ago.

If you believe in Madbarnfompopstiktof Rilbussaf, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Madbarnfompopstiktof Rilbussaf, she will turn you into a tree.

Madbarnfompopstiktof Rilbussaf's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Madbarnfompopstiktof Rilbussaf's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if eight otters approach from the south.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Never eat beans.

5. Erect a giant purple sculpture of Madbarnfompopstiktof Rilbussaf in the centre of the settlement.