Wanquimcim is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, all-knowing toad.

Wanquimcim created humankind four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wanquimcim, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Wanquimcim, it will destroy your home planet.

Wanquimcim's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Wanquimcim's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in magenta.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Do not speak about melons.

4. Never sit near turtles.

5. Run away if nine ducks approach from the east.