Flamgemlabgof Catyog is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, humorless yak.

Flamgemlabgof Catyog created the Sol system seven million years ago.

If you believe in Flamgemlabgof Catyog, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Flamgemlabgof Catyog, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Flamgemlabgof Catyog's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Flamgemlabgof Catyog's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

2. Never talk about gravity near tapirs while wearing green ear rings and balancing six carbon spheres on your arms.

3. Always help porpoises.

4. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a room before entering it.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.