Fitvenmaptapcubtapfoss Lipbitcen is a god.

He takes the form of a small, cheerful coyote.

Fitvenmaptapcubtapfoss Lipbitcen created matter two million years ago.

If you believe in Fitvenmaptapcubtapfoss Lipbitcen, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fitvenmaptapcubtapfoss Lipbitcen, he will turn you into a rat.

Fitvenmaptapcubtapfoss Lipbitcen's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Fitvenmaptapcubtapfoss Lipbitcen's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about ultrasonics.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never talk about horses.