Fumdosslak is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, happy goblin.

Fumdosslak created a top quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fumdosslak, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Fumdosslak, she will remove you from existence.

Fumdosslak's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Fumdosslak's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of lemons to capybaras while wearing green jumpers.

2. Never write about chromosomes.

3. Do not speak about carrots.

4. You must never eat corn.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.