Nurlflatzim is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, annoying clam.

Nurlflatzim created parasitic wasps eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurlflatzim, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Nurlflatzim, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Nurlflatzim's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Nurlflatzim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Erect a giant white sculpture of Nurlflatzim in the centre of the settlement.

3. Erect a giant carbon sculpture of Nurlflatzim in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. You must pray to Nurlflatzim three times a day.