Kopkenmad is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, omnipotent porpoise.

Kopkenmad created the Virgo Supercluster eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kopkenmad, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Kopkenmad, it will turn you into a slug.

Kopkenmad's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Kopkenmad's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention badgers.

2. Always help snails in need.

3. Never run in holy places.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always stare at clouds.