Jopbabflanban is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, egotistical raccoon.

Jopbabflanban created Mount Everest nine million years ago.

If you believe in Jopbabflanban, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Jopbabflanban, it will not care at all.

Jopbabflanban's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Jopbabflanban's Holy Commandments

1. Jopbabflanban loves geese, so they must be respected.

2. Never wear blue scarves.

3. Always help sick hamsters.

4. Always treat mice with great respect.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.