Fossbafzigarncedgofzod is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, narcissistic centipede.

Fossbafzigarncedgofzod created Europe eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fossbafzigarncedgofzod, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fossbafzigarncedgofzod, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Fossbafzigarncedgofzod's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Fossbafzigarncedgofzod's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear brown jumpers.

2. Never think about comets.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Always look after injured doves.

5. Never think about ultrasonics near great tits while wearing gray skirts and balancing three lead spheres on your head.