Getlarpwee is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, all-powerful guinea pig.

Getlarpwee created light nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Getlarpwee, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Getlarpwee, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Getlarpwee's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Getlarpwee's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into violet rooms.

2. You must never eat rice.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Run away from mauve turtles, for they are unholy.

5. Getlarpwee loves mites, so they must be honoured.