Bogtalgess is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, fussy dragon.

Bogtalgess created humankind six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bogtalgess, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bogtalgess, she will ignore you.

Bogtalgess' most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Bogtalgess' Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair black.

2. Retreat if seven whales approach from the east.

3. Always help cats in need.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never talk about quantum gravity near frogs while wearing fawn stockings.