Vagdundud is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, irritating finch.

Vagdundud created matter three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vagdundud, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Vagdundud, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Vagdundud's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Vagdundud's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about spacetime near bats while wearing green scarves and balancing three carbon spheres on your hands.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Always obey Vagdundud's priests.

4. Never paint your face mauve.

5. Erect a giant lead sculpture of Vagdundud in the centre of the settlement.