Timnarquag is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, slow bat.

Timnarquag created parasitic wasps three million years ago.

If you believe in Timnarquag, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Timnarquag, he will refuse to believe in you.

Timnarquag's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Timnarquag's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Always wear gray.

3. Timnarquag loves manatees, so they must be respected.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never play with disobedient children.