Kendibwig is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, able mink.

Kendibwig created the universe two billion years ago.

If you believe in Kendibwig, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Kendibwig, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Kendibwig's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Kendibwig's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Run away if seven geese approach from the east.

3. Never talk about ultrasonics near sheep while wearing turquoise skirts and balancing four iron spheres on your head.

4. Never feed lots of lentils to horses while wearing white jumpers.

5. Do not take Kendibwig's name in vain.