Nilhigkik is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, confident spider.

Nilhigkik created a charm quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nilhigkik, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Nilhigkik, it will destroy your favourite star.

Nilhigkik's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Nilhigkik's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never think about fluid mechanics near seals while wearing orange trousers and balancing five aluminium spheres on your neck.

3. Always make sure there are no aardvarks in a building before entering it.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never hurt mites.